It was a night like any other, I was lying on a mattress in a high rise condo, 16 years old, alive, invincible, and ultimately, stupid. You were talking to me that day, thru the messages, a desperate plea for a best friend, and now only do i realize was your own silent confession.
I knew it in my heart or maybe a wild guess that you had fell for me, but i was embracing a new life by then, a new world, a new belief. Embracing the feet of a fallen martyr, the man who died at Calvary. I knew then as i know now, that we were not meant to be. I am as always a rebel, refusing to bow down to any chains, be it religion or race. You were orthodox, innocent and pure.
I pushed you away, thinking it was for the best, only to have you in the back of my mind for the years to come. Now you reenter my life thru that window called Facebook.
I'm as sure of it now, as i was then, though age had given me a bit more brains and wisdom, as well as a certain measure of grace.
I love you.. always will.
The flames of first love burn brightest, flashing in a barren land untouched by its tongues. Forever it will burn, flickering, weakening, flaring, rising and falling with time, but never dying.
This post is dedicated to you, Spendergirl.

Shaz